I Can't Be the Only One

Earlier today at the speech and hearing center, I was swapping funny stories with some girls about falling in public. You know, just straight up falling down like an idiot when other folks are watching you. I've done my fair share of falling.

For example, there is a very steep hill that essentially separates the student parking lot from the speech and hearing center. Instead of walking about a million steps out of my way to avoid the hill, I just avoid walking a million extra steps and head straight down the hill. Now, I know what you're thinking, and you're absolutely right. There's not any way I could avoid falling on that hill at least once, and thankfully it has only happened once (so far). I thought I got away without anyone seeing me fall, too. That is, until I'm sitting in the classroom and a friend walks in and asks if I am okay. (I was mostly okay. My pride was a little injured).

But that's not the only time I have fallen in public. Oh no. When I was getting my undergrad degree, I had to walk up these nice, wide steps to get into the building where I had an advising appointment. Sounds simple, and it typically is. But for some reason, on that day, I could not handle walking up any steps. And so about halfway up, I just fell. Notebooks and papers flew everywhere, and I'm pretty certain that everyone on the concourse saw it. And only one guy kind of offered to help (it was only kind of because I managed to jump up and pretend it didn't happen almost immediately).

Yet another time, I tripped when I was walking from my place to one of my undergrad classes. It was about a mile, and so I was just leisurely enjoying the afternoon. And then I saw him: a hot guy on a lawnmower, mowing a lawn that was right beside my sidewalk. So I tried to act really cool in hopes that this guy, who I would never talk to, would think I was just a really cool person. Now take that sentence, and understand that absolutely none of it worked out in that manner. We actually did briefly communicate, but it was only because I tripped directly in front of him. He couldn't exactly ignore that. And he couldn't exactly think I was really cool, either.

But the best (or worst) falling story I have has to do with when I was walking to school one day in undergrad. There was this fairly busy four-way stop along my route, and there were these 3 or 4 concrete steps leading down to it. I was carrying my books/notebooks, like a good little college student, when my feet just zipped out from under me right in the middle of the stairs! The books and notebooks flew everywhere, and my butt actually got scratched up from the pavement. Thankfully, I don't think anyone actually saw my fanny, but that still doesn't fully remedy the fact that somehow my fanny got injured. I used my superior situation-recovery skills to immediately jump up and pretend it didn't happen. 

However, that didn't really impress any of the cars that were waiting at the intersection (or the people inside of them). For real, y'all, folks were just staring at me; no cars were moving. It was so embarrassing, because I had to walk across the street in front of them. I know exactly what they were thinking, too. "There goes that girl who injured her butt by falling down stairs at a four-way intersection. I can't wait to tell everyone I know about this."

Musings on Spiritual Gifts (Can I Please Have Them All?)

So I have always been curious about the different spiritual gifts mentioned in Scripture. It is fascinating how each Christian has these different God-given gifts that allow the Church to function as one giant, complex, unified body. I've actually been pondering a lot lately about what my spiritual gifts are and how I will be used by the Lord.

Just last night I went to a church meeting where we took a short spiritual gifts test, and I scored high in a few categories and pretty low in some others. Of course, this was just a short and informal test. I do not rely on it to inform me of what gifts the Lord has blessed me with, and I do not think it is the final word in the spiritual gifts department.

But what cracks me up is how I want ALL the spiritual gifts. There are gifts that I know I do not possess. I am pretty sure I do not have the gift of hospitality. I have neither spoken in tongues nor interpreted any tongues. If I've performed a miracle through the power of God, I am unaware of it. And I've never prophesied. And according to 1 Corinthians 14:1, I should really want that gift, like, a lot. 

I hope I don't look like this in real life.

I understand that if we all had the same gifts then the Church could not function as God intended. Each Christian would just do the exact same thing as every other Christian. There would only be one committee in every Baptist church. How could life go on without a Committee of Committees, a Toilet Paper Committee, or a No Skirts Shorter Than 3 Inches Above the Knee Committee? But really, so many jobs that the Lord calls His children to do would never get done or would be done poorly. So it is good that there are many gifts and that we are blessed with different ones.

I still want them all, though.

Just A Typical Football Post

So y'all know that I go to the best football school in the entire world (this is hardly an exaggeration). The school is pretty nifty when it comes to football, in case you haven't heard. As in two-national-championships-in-the-last-three-years kind of nifty. That phrase was hyphenated and italicized because if I were to read it aloud to you, I would read it really quickly and with emphasis.

Before I write anything else, I just want to state that I graduated from a rival university. It is fabulous, I loved going to school there, and I can't wait to visit that lovely town again. I even went to football games, cheered for them, and had a fabulous time! But let's just be honest: my current school kinda wins the football battle against my former school. I know that there are years in which this is not true; I don't wanna hear about it again because I've heard about it a ridiculous number of times. But currently, this is true. And also the number of national championships between the two teams indicates the truth of my statement.

But really, because of the whole football greatness thing, games exist solely on either end of the stress continuum.

On one end, opponents decide that football just really ain't their thang, and they just play child games while my team whoops 'em. It gets kinda boring. There's not any stress or tension, and so everyone just leaves at half-time. Who doesn't like to pay a million dollars to watch half a game?

That's for real supposed to be a drawing of a sleeping person, but there's a reason I'm in school to become a speech pathologist and not an artist.

On the other end, a team actually shows up to play Big Boy Football, and nobody knows how to react. As the game progresses and the teams actually struggle against each other to win, all us fans are falling out of our seats and pulling out our hair. It suddenly becomes more intense and stressful than finals, elections, and hurricanes. And if a loss actually occurs, then it's like the entire world has ended and we can't ever face anyone who cheers for another team. Because they'll call us losers. Like they've never lost a game (except for all those games that they've lost).

Let's just be honest, football is always kind of stressful. I'm super nervous for the players. When I hear their helmets hit each other, it's just awful. I'm certain that I've seen way more concussions occur than I should have ever seen simply through watching football. Every time someone is tackled my blood pressure rises until everyone gets up and walks away from the scene of the attack. I know, no need to be dramatic, but really there's a need to be dramatic. Those poor fellows could get really hurt! That's probably an intensely girly thing to state, but whatever.

So the moral of this post is to watch football or don't live in the Southeast.